Redneck's Wife
Grey Slug Update
Ok, so he did move...a little. I promise, I'll post on more meaningful things at some point.
The Enemy
Gaaaaah! I hate these. I guess they are called "oxalis" and they WILL NOT go away, and they are threatening to take over my yard. Hopefully copious amounts of
this and
this will help.
One website I looked at helpfully said this:
These hardy plants are quite difficult to get rid of once they have taken root. For some gardeners, however, this is one case where the adage "If you can't beat 'em join 'em" really does have a happy ending.
The showy flowers unfurl every morning to reveal their bright yellow trumpets and then wrap themselves back into a closed tube towards evening.
Awww, isn't that nice? Um, no. If I let them alone, they would be the only thing in my yard. That is NOT going to happen. /rant
The Grey Slug
Just look at this:
And he'll stay there all day.
Sometimes I wish I was him.
Pumpkin Update
There was also target practice (BB gun)
I should mention that I also took aim, but then the BB ricocheted off the fence and almost hit a family member in the eye. I went back inside.
Pumpkins
So I had a tasteful display of pumpkins on the front porch. Nice, huh?
Murder
And then there was this Travesty:
The Weapon of Choice
Why is he a redneck?
When I say redneck, let me emphasize that I don't mean it in a bad way. It's just that so many people are shocked that he grew up in the Bay Area. My husband and I often laugh about what a redneck he is.
For one thing, he works in the yard wearing overalls and a straw cowbow hat. He insisted on getting checks with the NRA logo on them and called me a communist when I objected.
He shot a BB gun at our Halloween pumpkin on Thanksgiving. Well, there is also the fact that we still
had the pumpkin at Thanksgiving, I guess. In fact, it may still be in the backyard. But it's not carved, okay? More about the pumpkin later.
Mostly he seems so old-fashioned, never wearing shorts, never owning a pair of tennis shoes, lamenting that no one gets dressed up when they go out anymore, balking at the idea of having a cell phone.
Anyway, after 9 years of marriage, we are very happy, and I wouldn't change him at all. Although sometimes I do want a cell phone.